Thursday, February 8, 2024

Words fail me

I sat down to write

As her memories

And my anxieties

Had started choking me

I placed on the desk a blank sheet of paper

Picked the pen up and guided it over

Even before I could write a word

My heart jumped out and sat on the paper

That was the easy part

But now I was thinking hard

About the words

That will replace my heart

Will express my feelings

The words that might say

That my life was missing

My pain had now breached all limits

But no words surfaced, that will fit

Even after a very long struggle

Words didn’t emerge in my mind

Gingerly I held my head

And was clearly in a bind

I dropped the pen in the slot

And shut the inkpot

My eyes were welling up

And tears were rolling down

Onto the paper in front

Forming unshapely circles

Soon entire paper was covered…


My feelings were perfectly expressed

Tears had said all that was in my mind

But real words?

Words failed me, one more time




In memory of bliss

Somewhere in the distance, far away

When the day reaches its zenith

And the evening arrives quietly

Like a shy hesitant bride

Lighting lamps of my memories

When memories make my breath heavy

And well my eyes up for no visible reason

The love reaches out to soothe the tension

I know it’s you who touched me

A dusky bride facing me

Some hearts remain distant forever

And some for eternity, belong together

My own mind becomes my enemy

Since it offers to suffer

For your pains inside me

When I find myself in such complexities

I light a lamp of your memories

In my heart I store

My deepest secrets

Secrets of my everlasting dreams

I exist due to those golden dreams

If only a shadow of my dream escaped

Heart may be beating but mind will be dead

When the day ends

Sun wraps up its rays

Taking away the dreamy shadows

The evening turns into a bride

Covered in a dark cloak

And arrives by my side

Quietly




World and her story

Time is passing

So is life

Cross roads, hairpin bends,

Steep climbs, landmarks

All falling behind

I can see a path winding away

Far in the distance

Dissolving into nothingness

One end of which is under my feet

The other seems to be

At the end of my vision

After that… nothing

After that… nothing,

Would be wrong to say

After all, the rest of the world

Has to be there

Somewhere,

Beyond the end of the path

Beyond the end of my vision

Yes, the world made by man

Will cease to exist

But world untouched by man

Will still be there

In its full glory

Narrating its amazing story.

I will pass away

You too will be gone

Our sorrows would be wiped off

Smiles will fade leaving no mark

Storytellers will not be around

Listeners also would have passed

But the world will go on

Narrating her story on her own.

Alexander, Babar, Genghis Khan

Christ, Kabir and Krshn

Winners and vanquished

Killers and the killed

All dumped randomly

Unceremoniously

In the dark silence

Of a little old box

Not moving

Not speaking

Yet wearing the crown

With a bloody sword in hand

Not knowing their story is done.



Curating 27 Down Files

It was end of 1971. I was still at the Film Institute doing my final year of sound recording course. One fine evening some of my friends sai...